SO I stayed away for a few months for this internship which I was doing and I found out that I have an actual eating disorder. I know..
I stayed by myself during this time and found that every evening after work I would look forward to stopping by the grocery store and buying lots of junk to eat. EVERY EVENING. I’m talking about 2 big bags of chips, 2 ice cream cones, 2 whole biscuit packs, and lots of chocolates too! Sometimes I would get some dim sum on my way back. Keep in mind, during this time, i had one proper healthy meal only. No breakfast or dinner.
There was even a time when I bought these junk food and ate them all by myself as usual. And then since I was working on this intensive project, once I was done, I felt I needed to treat myself. Even after I ate SO MUCH, I decided, hmmm a really good Pizza would be amazing. Later that night, just as planned, I found myself eating a whole cheese burst pizza (meaning cheese inbetween the dough), cheesy garlic bread and 2 molten chocolate cakes.
THIS WAS HORRIBLE.
I felt horrible after eating these everyday. And I couldn’t stop myself. I actually did not know what to do. It was driving me insane and it became a cycle.
Once I moved back, I saw that I had gained about 10 kgs. I shouldn’t be surprised actually, but I was still so angry at myself. So here’s the deal. Its April.
I decided to get a personal trainer. Quite heavy on the pocket but if you think about how this is for my health, I couldn’t really put a price on it.
She’s really nice. I had my first session with her yesterday. I will give you more updates on that in the next blog post. But mainly just wanted to let you know that things might actually be looking up from here. And I plan to keep myself accountable through this blog. I will give you details of my work out. Food plans. How much weight I have to lose and of course the physical and emotional struggle through it all.
Thanks for reading and sticking with me despite everything. *Crickets chriping*